Lua Nova, 12 de Junho de 2010
Hoje vou chegar atrasado... Eu tentei, a sério que tentei. Mas viver junto à praia durante o Verão, significa filas de carros todos os dias.
"Bom dia, Rui. Hoje, estás atrasado." A recepcionista cumprimentou-me.
"Olá! Eu sei... Tentei vir o mais rápido que pude, mas -"
"Não te preocupes, ainda tens muito tempo. Ela hoje não está de muito bom humor e demorámos muito mais tempo a fazer com que tomasse banho."
"Desculpem."
"Não precisas de pedir desculpa, nós sabemos que ela não tem culpa. E tu também não, por isso vai e aproveita a última hora que te resta."
"Ok." Apressei-me para o quarto onde ela estava.
Nº 135, 137, 139 e cá está: 141. Bati a porta.
Não houve resposta. Esperei e bati de novo...
"Sim?" Respondeu uma voz muito irritada.
Abri a porta e tentei a minha sorte. "Desculpe incomodá-la Sra. Helena, mas posso entrar?"
"Depende do que vem fazer." Disse a mulher que estava sentada na cama, a olhar fixamente para a janela.
"Venho conversar... Se não quiser eu posso-me ir embora." Acrescentei com um tom de tristeza.
"Só conversar?" Virou-se para mim.
"Só conversar." Assegurei-lhe com um sorriso.
"Acho que não faz mal... É bom para variar de todas os outros que aqui estiveram hoje. Onde é que já se viu! A forçarem-me a comer, a tomar comprimidos e até me tentaram despir!" Ela disse muito revoltada.
Tentei acalmá-la. "De certeza que só queriam ajudá-la..."
"Eu não preciso da ajuda deles!" Gritou. "O que preciso é de ir para casa. Ir para a minha família..." Voltou-se de novo para a janela. "Mas, afinal quem és tu?"
Sentei-me no sofá perto da cama. "Ricardo."
"Ricardo, hum?" Desviou a sua atenção para mim e analisou-me de alto a baixo. Mantive alguma esperança que me reconhecesse. "Podes tratar-me por Lena."
Já devia esperar que não o fizesse. "Ok!" Sorri-lhe. "Estava-me a dizer que tinha de ir para casa, porquê?"
"Porque o meu filho está sozinho em casa... Sozinho, não. As enfermeiras dizem que telefonaram à minha irmã para ficar com ele enquanto estou de observação." Endireitou-se. "Pelos vistos desmaiei no centro comercial e fui trazida para aqui."
"Sério? Mas é alguma coisa séria?"
"Parece que não, mas querem fazer uma data de exames e preferem que eu fique por cá." Suspirou enquanto olhava para mim. "E você, Ricardo? O que está aqui a fazer?"
"Bem, eu..." O que é que tenho desta vez? "Tenho de fazer uns raios-X. Acho que torci o pé a jogar basquetebol. Enquanto esperava reslvi ver se haveria alguém com quem pudesse conversar."
"Joga basquetebol?" Assenti com a cabeça. "Sabe... Esse é o desporto preferido do meu filho! Ele tem 7 anos e eu queria inscrevê-lo num clube qualquer, onde ele pudesse jogar à vontade... Mas, não sei de nenhum que seja compatível com o meu horário. Nestas alturas é que dava jeito que o pai dele ainda estivesse vivo..."
Acho que se a conversa continuar eu começo a chorar. "Eu posso procurar alguns... Amanhã quando voltar passo por aqui e dou-lhe a lista."
Os olhos dela brilharam com alegria. "A sério? Faria isso por mim?"
"Claro!" Por ti faria qualquer coisa... "No entanto, agora tenho de me ir embora."
"Oh! Muito obrigada... Quando o Rui crescer, espero que seja um jovem como o Ricardo."
Corei. "Com uma mãe como a Lena, de certeza que será. Adeus."
"Adeus, até amanhã."
Levantei-me e saí do quarto. Mais um dia em que não se lembrava de mim.
Das primeiras vezes, saía de repente do quarto lavado em lágrimas... Muitas vezes ainda é isso que me apetece fazer. Principalmente quando perguntava «Quem és?».
Passei pela recepcionista e relatei-lhe a visita e ela anotava no processo.
Depois, agradeceu-me e despediu-se. "Adeus! Não te preocupes... Se ela se lembrar de alguma coisa, da visita de hoje, de outro dia, ou da realidade, telefono-te o mais rápido possível."
Agradeci-lhe e fui-me embora do lar.
Sinceramente, nunca pensei que tivesse de passar por isto. Pensava que este tipo de coisas só aparecia em filmes, livros ou então só acontecia aos outros...
Isto prova que estava enganado. Agora já aceitei isto. Já sei que não é um pesadelo... A dor que sinto após cada visita semanal relembra-me de que estou acordado.
Não há nada que magoe mais um filho do que não ser reconhecido pela própria mãe.
No entanto, é isto que acontece quando alguém tem Alzheimer... Pessoas magoadas, quando os entes mais queridos se esquecem de todos os laços que formaram durante a vida.
domingo, 13 de junho de 2010
quinta-feira, 10 de junho de 2010
I LOVE YOU - alternative chapter 10
Aviso: Para as pessoas que leram o outro capítulo e gostaram: não leiam este. Este capítulo apresenta um final alternativo para a história. Eu avisei-vos...
I don't think I can say it out loud! But I agreed to do it, so here goes... "I love... a guy." ... nothing. He looked a bit dumbfounded. "Errr... All right?"
"He's in our school." Why am I so embarassed? He already said he loved me, what am I afraid of? "He hasn't blond hair nor blue eyes." Maybe because I can't believe him.
"Hey, Kim..." I looked at him. "Calm down and breathe... You look like you're about to have a heart attack."
I did as he told me. It seemed to work, so I continued... "Actually, he's somewhat of an idiot." He smothered a chuckle. Only if he knew it was him... I smiled. This was becoming really entertaing! Time for some jealousy. "Even so, he's very smart. He's one of the best students in his class." He twitched an eyebrow. "And he isn't only brains, he has the looks too."
"Well, why don't you skip all the compliments to your Prince Charming and give me a name..." He said infuriated. "Maybe I can take care of his «looks»!"
"Stop it!" I was trying so hard not to laugh. "If you keep saying that I won't tell you anything!"
He shut up.
"Thank you... I'll continue, but it will be the way I want to. Where was I? Oh! I know. He's so beautiful... What I love more about him is his eyes. Its colour is so unusual but still so magnetic! He looks at you in such an intense way that it seems that looks right through you..."
He was so flushed and hurt that he looked miserable but still he didn't say a word. I was going to end this.
"Even being like this, he's not arrogant. He's the kindest and cutest person I know... Maybe that's why he's so popular." I gathered all my courage to say it. I wasn't afraid anymore: he was my friend, respected me and, above of all, he loved me.
"He doesn't need blond hair... His light brown hair is enough." I looked directly to him.
"He doesn't care about blue eyes... His gold ones stand out more." I stood up in put myself in front of him.
"He may be a jerk sometimes... But he's my best friend." I smiled at his surprise.
"He is the one I love." I ended closing the small space between us with a soft kiss.
I can't believe myself. I did it!
"I love you."
Jeff stared at me... He was so quiet that I thought he was going to end up in a coma again but he finally spoke. "You love me?" Then he flashed the biggest grin I've ever seen. "I was so worried that you'd say you loved any other guy... I thought I wouldn't bear with it! Seriously, I was about to storm out of the hospital and look everywhere for the guy just to punch him to death..." He then hugged me (the best he could, because of his broken arm). "Thanks. For everything..." He said this last words not louder than a whisper. I closed my eyes enjoying his warm embrace and we stood there for what seemed like hours.
Then I heard an annoying sound.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
What was this?
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
I opened my eyes and saw the worst cenario ever. Jeff was lying in a bed in front of me and that sound was warning me that his heart had stopped.
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
"DAD!!" I screamed as loud as I could. "NURSE! Someone please HELP ME!"
I couldn't believe it! I was having a dream... All of it. Jeff never woke up.
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
He never knew how I felt about him. I let the tears flow freely from my eyes as my father and other doctors entered the room. There was so much noise. I didn't know how, but I already knew he wasn't going to make it. I just knew it...
They stopped everything and said the only thing I didn't want to hear. "Jeffrey Anderson: time of death 4:27 a.m.."
--eeeeeeeeeeeee-p
The nurse turned the machine off.
My whole body was shaking. A while ago I was with him... Nothing seemed to have changed.
I looked at my father. He was saying something... I couldn't hear him, or I didn't want to... I don't know.
I left the room and run outside. I went against some people along the way because my vision was all blurry. I mumbled some kind of «Sorry.» and continued not even caring if the person was okay... I wasn't.
I got outside and stared at the road. There were already lots of vehicles speeding, not realizing that many of them can cause accidents... They just care about their own lives. Jeff wasn't like that. I started to move in their direction.
Someone grabbed my arm and pulled me back. It was my father.
"Kim! Please don't do that. Don't do anything stupid!" He was crying. I stayed there motionless, just staring. "I know how much it hurts..." He said, now looking at me. "To lose someone we love." It was as painful as stabbing my heart with knives, so I cried. I couldn't stop.
My father cried too. "I know how you feel, sweetheart. I already lost your mother and I don't want to lose you." My crying intensified. "That's why I want you to promise me that you won't do anything reckless... Anything that will make me repent for letting go of you."
"I promise." I said between loud sobs.
And I stood there with the last important person in my life until we both stop crying. Whether it was for old painful memories, brand new heartbreaking memories or future wrecking memories, I didn't know. Neither of us knew.
I only knew I had to survive through my only lover's death and I had a new promise to fulfil.
I promised that I wouldn't kill myself...
I don't care much because I will die.
However, I don't have to live.
I never promised that.
I don't think I can say it out loud! But I agreed to do it, so here goes... "I love... a guy." ... nothing. He looked a bit dumbfounded. "Errr... All right?"
"He's in our school." Why am I so embarassed? He already said he loved me, what am I afraid of? "He hasn't blond hair nor blue eyes." Maybe because I can't believe him.
"Hey, Kim..." I looked at him. "Calm down and breathe... You look like you're about to have a heart attack."
I did as he told me. It seemed to work, so I continued... "Actually, he's somewhat of an idiot." He smothered a chuckle. Only if he knew it was him... I smiled. This was becoming really entertaing! Time for some jealousy. "Even so, he's very smart. He's one of the best students in his class." He twitched an eyebrow. "And he isn't only brains, he has the looks too."
"Well, why don't you skip all the compliments to your Prince Charming and give me a name..." He said infuriated. "Maybe I can take care of his «looks»!"
"Stop it!" I was trying so hard not to laugh. "If you keep saying that I won't tell you anything!"
He shut up.
"Thank you... I'll continue, but it will be the way I want to. Where was I? Oh! I know. He's so beautiful... What I love more about him is his eyes. Its colour is so unusual but still so magnetic! He looks at you in such an intense way that it seems that looks right through you..."
He was so flushed and hurt that he looked miserable but still he didn't say a word. I was going to end this.
"Even being like this, he's not arrogant. He's the kindest and cutest person I know... Maybe that's why he's so popular." I gathered all my courage to say it. I wasn't afraid anymore: he was my friend, respected me and, above of all, he loved me.
"He doesn't need blond hair... His light brown hair is enough." I looked directly to him.
"He doesn't care about blue eyes... His gold ones stand out more." I stood up in put myself in front of him.
"He may be a jerk sometimes... But he's my best friend." I smiled at his surprise.
"He is the one I love." I ended closing the small space between us with a soft kiss.
I can't believe myself. I did it!
"I love you."
Jeff stared at me... He was so quiet that I thought he was going to end up in a coma again but he finally spoke. "You love me?" Then he flashed the biggest grin I've ever seen. "I was so worried that you'd say you loved any other guy... I thought I wouldn't bear with it! Seriously, I was about to storm out of the hospital and look everywhere for the guy just to punch him to death..." He then hugged me (the best he could, because of his broken arm). "Thanks. For everything..." He said this last words not louder than a whisper. I closed my eyes enjoying his warm embrace and we stood there for what seemed like hours.
Then I heard an annoying sound.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
What was this?
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
I opened my eyes and saw the worst cenario ever. Jeff was lying in a bed in front of me and that sound was warning me that his heart had stopped.
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
"DAD!!" I screamed as loud as I could. "NURSE! Someone please HELP ME!"
I couldn't believe it! I was having a dream... All of it. Jeff never woke up.
--eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--
He never knew how I felt about him. I let the tears flow freely from my eyes as my father and other doctors entered the room. There was so much noise. I didn't know how, but I already knew he wasn't going to make it. I just knew it...
They stopped everything and said the only thing I didn't want to hear. "Jeffrey Anderson: time of death 4:27 a.m.."
--eeeeeeeeeeeee-p
The nurse turned the machine off.
My whole body was shaking. A while ago I was with him... Nothing seemed to have changed.
I looked at my father. He was saying something... I couldn't hear him, or I didn't want to... I don't know.
I left the room and run outside. I went against some people along the way because my vision was all blurry. I mumbled some kind of «Sorry.» and continued not even caring if the person was okay... I wasn't.
I got outside and stared at the road. There were already lots of vehicles speeding, not realizing that many of them can cause accidents... They just care about their own lives. Jeff wasn't like that. I started to move in their direction.
Someone grabbed my arm and pulled me back. It was my father.
"Kim! Please don't do that. Don't do anything stupid!" He was crying. I stayed there motionless, just staring. "I know how much it hurts..." He said, now looking at me. "To lose someone we love." It was as painful as stabbing my heart with knives, so I cried. I couldn't stop.
My father cried too. "I know how you feel, sweetheart. I already lost your mother and I don't want to lose you." My crying intensified. "That's why I want you to promise me that you won't do anything reckless... Anything that will make me repent for letting go of you."
"I promise." I said between loud sobs.
And I stood there with the last important person in my life until we both stop crying. Whether it was for old painful memories, brand new heartbreaking memories or future wrecking memories, I didn't know. Neither of us knew.
I only knew I had to survive through my only lover's death and I had a new promise to fulfil.
I promised that I wouldn't kill myself...
I don't care much because I will die.
However, I don't have to live.
I never promised that.
The (alternative) End
I LOVE YOU - chapter 10
I don't think I can say it out loud! But I agreed to do it, so here goes... "I love... a guy." ... nothing.
He looked a bit dumbfounded. "Errr... All right?"
"He's in our school." Why am I so embarassed? He already said he loved me, what am I afraid of? "He hasn't blond hair nor blue eyes." Maybe because I can't believe him.
"Hey, Kim..." I looked at him. "Calm down and breathe... You look like you're about to have a heart attack."
I did as he told me. It seemed to work, so I continued... "Actually, he's somewhat of an idiot." He smothered a chuckle. Only if he knew it was him... I smiled. This was becoming really entertaing!
Time for some jealousy. "Even so, he's very smart. He's one of the best students in his class." He twitched an eyebrow. "And he isn't only brains, he has the looks too."
"Well, why don't you skip all the compliments to your Prince Charming and give me a name..." He said infuriated. "Maybe I can take care of his «looks»!"
"Stop it!" I was trying so hard not to laugh. "If you keep saying that I won't tell you anything!"
He shut up.
"Thank you... I'll continue, but it will be the way I want to. Where was I? Oh! I know. He's so beautiful... What I love more about him is his eyes. Its colour is so unusual but still so magnetic! He looks at you in such an intense way that it seems that looks right through you..."
He was so flushed and hurt that he looked miserable but still he didn't say a word. I was going to end this.
"Even being like this, he's not arrogant. He's the kindest and cutest person I know... Maybe that's why he's so popular." I gathered all my courage to say it. I wasn't afraid anymore: he was my friend, respected me and, above of all, he loved me.
"He doesn't need blond hair... His light brown hair is enough." I looked directly to him.
"He doesn't care about blue eyes... His gold ones stand out more." I stood up in put myself in front of him.
"He may be a jerk sometimes... But he's my best friend." I smiled at his surprise.
"He is the one I love." I ended closing the small space between us with a soft kiss.
I can't believe myself. I did it!
"I love you."
Jeff stared at me... He was so quiet that I thought he was going to end up in a coma again but he finally spoke. "You love me?" Then he flashed the biggest grin I've ever seen. "I was so worried that you'd say you loved any other guy... I thought I wouldn't bear with it! Seriously, I was about to storm out of the hospital and look everywhere for the guy just to punch him to death..." He then hugged me (the best he could, because of his broken arm). "Thanks." He looked so peaceful. "I love you so much! Thank you for everything..."
"Anytime." And so, we stood there holding each other and secretly vowing to love each other for the rest of our days on Earth.
I knew he'd never let me down. His golden eyes told me that.
He knew I knew that. His love for me showed that.
He looked a bit dumbfounded. "Errr... All right?"
"He's in our school." Why am I so embarassed? He already said he loved me, what am I afraid of? "He hasn't blond hair nor blue eyes." Maybe because I can't believe him.
"Hey, Kim..." I looked at him. "Calm down and breathe... You look like you're about to have a heart attack."
I did as he told me. It seemed to work, so I continued... "Actually, he's somewhat of an idiot." He smothered a chuckle. Only if he knew it was him... I smiled. This was becoming really entertaing!
Time for some jealousy. "Even so, he's very smart. He's one of the best students in his class." He twitched an eyebrow. "And he isn't only brains, he has the looks too."
"Well, why don't you skip all the compliments to your Prince Charming and give me a name..." He said infuriated. "Maybe I can take care of his «looks»!"
"Stop it!" I was trying so hard not to laugh. "If you keep saying that I won't tell you anything!"
He shut up.
"Thank you... I'll continue, but it will be the way I want to. Where was I? Oh! I know. He's so beautiful... What I love more about him is his eyes. Its colour is so unusual but still so magnetic! He looks at you in such an intense way that it seems that looks right through you..."
He was so flushed and hurt that he looked miserable but still he didn't say a word. I was going to end this.
"Even being like this, he's not arrogant. He's the kindest and cutest person I know... Maybe that's why he's so popular." I gathered all my courage to say it. I wasn't afraid anymore: he was my friend, respected me and, above of all, he loved me.
"He doesn't need blond hair... His light brown hair is enough." I looked directly to him.
"He doesn't care about blue eyes... His gold ones stand out more." I stood up in put myself in front of him.
"He may be a jerk sometimes... But he's my best friend." I smiled at his surprise.
"He is the one I love." I ended closing the small space between us with a soft kiss.
I can't believe myself. I did it!
"I love you."
Jeff stared at me... He was so quiet that I thought he was going to end up in a coma again but he finally spoke. "You love me?" Then he flashed the biggest grin I've ever seen. "I was so worried that you'd say you loved any other guy... I thought I wouldn't bear with it! Seriously, I was about to storm out of the hospital and look everywhere for the guy just to punch him to death..." He then hugged me (the best he could, because of his broken arm). "Thanks." He looked so peaceful. "I love you so much! Thank you for everything..."
"Anytime." And so, we stood there holding each other and secretly vowing to love each other for the rest of our days on Earth.
I knew he'd never let me down. His golden eyes told me that.
He knew I knew that. His love for me showed that.
The End
quarta-feira, 9 de junho de 2010
EXPLANATION - chapter 9
What the fuck?
My left cheek sting as hell!
"You... You slapped me!" I shouted at her.
She was clearly embarassed: her face was completely red that I'd joke about it in other situation. "You could have said «No!» or something like that!" I kept screaming. "I didn't know you hated me that much!"
"Excuse me? You're the one who ignored me a whole week and when I asked you why you just glared and turned away!" She retorted.
"And slapping me solves anything?"
"Yes! I mean... No! But it helps..."
"What?" I can't believe it! What about anger management classes?
"Now you can start and explain why is that you've been running away from me." She stated while sitting down on my bed. "I demand an explanation."
She demands? "All right. I've been thinking." About you, truth to be told.
"Wow." She said emotionless. "That's a first."
"What? You wanted an explanation!"
"So, you started thinking and came to the conclusion that you don't want to hang out with me?"
"Hum? No, I never said that!" Is she insane? Where did she came up with that theory?
"Then «I've been thinking.» isn't an explanation for avoiding me."
"Errr... Just stop acting like that! I wasn't avoiding you! The thing is: the guys said some stuff and I needed some time to think about it." I explained. "On my own."
"Why didn't you tell me that? It would have been easier."
How was I going to get out of this? Now you could be very helpful. "It crossed my mind... But then you'd get in Sherlock Holmes' mode and try to find out what was the things they told me." I used as an excuse. A good one. "Now it's my turn of demanding explanations." She sat up straight and I continued. "Why did you slap me? If your excuse was true then you'd have done it earlier... Now spit it!"
She took a deep breath. "Well... You are my best friend and I don't want to ruin this friendship?..."
"I don't buy it."
"It was because of the shock?"
"Nope." She could at least put a bit more effort on it. "Let's put it other way... Why did you kissed back instead of pushing away?"
She didn't answer and look other way.
"So?"
She flushed even more.
"You're in love with other guy, right?" Her head snapped in my direction. "It's the only explanation..."
"What?" She whispered. "That's not it..."
"Then what is it?" I was boiling in rage. "I bet you like that Ben from the other class... Who wouldn't fall for a boy with blond hair and blue eyes who has the guts to proclaim is love in front of everyone? That's so typical that I'd never expected it from you..."
She was trembling with anger. "That is not true. You know that I hated the fact that he shouted out loud from the top of the stairs how much he loved me and wanted to be my lover... Besides he's not the one that I love."
See? I knew it! "So there's love after all!" I didn't try to hide the scowl on my face.
"..."
"Who is he?" She turned away. "Tell me."
"Why do you care anyway?" She asked. "You're one of the most popular guys on the school and you have a very large group of girls who gladly would date you... And that includes all the other girls in our class. So, why me?"
"In case you missed the kiss a while ago I love you!" I bet that now I was even more flushed than she was. "You and not any other girl on the whole school."
"Why?"
"Because you're not a typical girl..." I was smiling a bit now. "You understand me, solve all the «problems» I get into, don't crawl all over me expecting popularity and a lot of other things." I added.
She looked like she was about to cry but it was somewhat different... More like she was too happy. "True." She chuckled.
"The true reason why I was keeping some distance between us was because the boys were saying jokes about us acting like a old married couple, though we weren't one, and when I explained that they got all surprised because we looked like boyfriend and girlfriend because we're together all the time and so close... And about how protective I am of you." I told her. "So I started thinking about it and came to the conclusion that I cared about you... A lot. So I avoided you to think more clearly. When you came and confronted me about it I didn't meant to glare, I was just angry at myself about not noticing earlier how much I loved you and I totally forgot that you were there waiting for an explanation." I finished. I looked at her and notice how glad she was. "The least you could do is telling me who do you love... I'm still your friend."
"Fine."
My left cheek sting as hell!
"You... You slapped me!" I shouted at her.
She was clearly embarassed: her face was completely red that I'd joke about it in other situation. "You could have said «No!» or something like that!" I kept screaming. "I didn't know you hated me that much!"
"Excuse me? You're the one who ignored me a whole week and when I asked you why you just glared and turned away!" She retorted.
"And slapping me solves anything?"
"Yes! I mean... No! But it helps..."
"What?" I can't believe it! What about anger management classes?
"Now you can start and explain why is that you've been running away from me." She stated while sitting down on my bed. "I demand an explanation."
She demands? "All right. I've been thinking." About you, truth to be told.
"Wow." She said emotionless. "That's a first."
"What? You wanted an explanation!"
"So, you started thinking and came to the conclusion that you don't want to hang out with me?"
"Hum? No, I never said that!" Is she insane? Where did she came up with that theory?
"Then «I've been thinking.» isn't an explanation for avoiding me."
"Errr... Just stop acting like that! I wasn't avoiding you! The thing is: the guys said some stuff and I needed some time to think about it." I explained. "On my own."
"Why didn't you tell me that? It would have been easier."
How was I going to get out of this? Now you could be very helpful. "It crossed my mind... But then you'd get in Sherlock Holmes' mode and try to find out what was the things they told me." I used as an excuse. A good one. "Now it's my turn of demanding explanations." She sat up straight and I continued. "Why did you slap me? If your excuse was true then you'd have done it earlier... Now spit it!"
She took a deep breath. "Well... You are my best friend and I don't want to ruin this friendship?..."
"I don't buy it."
"It was because of the shock?"
"Nope." She could at least put a bit more effort on it. "Let's put it other way... Why did you kissed back instead of pushing away?"
She didn't answer and look other way.
"So?"
She flushed even more.
"You're in love with other guy, right?" Her head snapped in my direction. "It's the only explanation..."
"What?" She whispered. "That's not it..."
"Then what is it?" I was boiling in rage. "I bet you like that Ben from the other class... Who wouldn't fall for a boy with blond hair and blue eyes who has the guts to proclaim is love in front of everyone? That's so typical that I'd never expected it from you..."
She was trembling with anger. "That is not true. You know that I hated the fact that he shouted out loud from the top of the stairs how much he loved me and wanted to be my lover... Besides he's not the one that I love."
See? I knew it! "So there's love after all!" I didn't try to hide the scowl on my face.
"..."
"Who is he?" She turned away. "Tell me."
"Why do you care anyway?" She asked. "You're one of the most popular guys on the school and you have a very large group of girls who gladly would date you... And that includes all the other girls in our class. So, why me?"
"In case you missed the kiss a while ago I love you!" I bet that now I was even more flushed than she was. "You and not any other girl on the whole school."
"Why?"
"Because you're not a typical girl..." I was smiling a bit now. "You understand me, solve all the «problems» I get into, don't crawl all over me expecting popularity and a lot of other things." I added.
She looked like she was about to cry but it was somewhat different... More like she was too happy. "True." She chuckled.
"The true reason why I was keeping some distance between us was because the boys were saying jokes about us acting like a old married couple, though we weren't one, and when I explained that they got all surprised because we looked like boyfriend and girlfriend because we're together all the time and so close... And about how protective I am of you." I told her. "So I started thinking about it and came to the conclusion that I cared about you... A lot. So I avoided you to think more clearly. When you came and confronted me about it I didn't meant to glare, I was just angry at myself about not noticing earlier how much I loved you and I totally forgot that you were there waiting for an explanation." I finished. I looked at her and notice how glad she was. "The least you could do is telling me who do you love... I'm still your friend."
"Fine."
domingo, 6 de junho de 2010
KISS - chapter 8
I got up and paid for my breakfast. What would I do now? Go home or wait?
I picked up my phone and wondered whether to call my father or not. As if it was magic it rang.
"Hi, dad!"
"Hi. Where are you?" My father retorted.
"I'm still in the hospital. Somewhere in the 4th floor."
"Oh. All right. Do you plan on going home or will you stick around with Jeff?"
Well, not exactly with Jeff. "Err... I'll be around here and then go home with you." Good, this way I won't be lying.
My father said «goodbye» and hung up... Now the only question left: what will I do?
Going back to Jeff's room doesn't sound like a good idea. Even though I know that he probably doesn't want me around, I guess I wouldn't bear to hear that from his mouth.
I could always go and take a walk in the garden... Yeah, that's a good idea!
"Aaarrghh!! Leave me alone!" Someone was shouting in the lobby. I rushed there to see what was happening.
"I'm sorry, but you have to come with me." It was another person. His voice didn't seem very happy.
"But I didn't do anything wrong!!" A boy said in his defence. "And I'm telling the truth! My arm IS broken!"
"I don't care! Who the hell said that you could enter the supplies room?" So the other man should be a policeman or something like that...
"I already apologized... I was only looking for someone and... Ooouch!!!" That sounds painful. "Excuse me! Could you at least hold me by the other arm?!"
When I got there, well, you can picture the scene: the policeman dragging the boy outside the hospital. And now... Surprise, surprise: the boy is Jeff. I should have guessed... I leave him alone and he screws everything up. Maybe I should just let the man take him... And again, if I did that there was the possibility that my father would be accused of negligence or so for letting a stupid patient, also known as Jeff, alone.
I was going to rescue him. "Excuse me, officer."
Two (very surprised) heads turn to face me. Jeff was the first one to talk. "Kim! Thank god you're here. I wa-"
"Quiet!" The man ordered Jeff and then talked to me. "Yes?"
"I'm very sorry for Jeff... My name is Kim and I know him: he's my father's patient. He suffered a car accident and hit his head, so he must be a bit confused and left the room, probably looking for me." I explained to the very angry man in front of me. After staring at me for a while his face softened... My apologetic and innocent look is amazing.
"Very well. Please make sure you don't leave him alone this time." The policeman let Jeff go, who immediately run to my side. "I don't want to be disturbed again because of him."
"I'm sorry." I apologized again and elbowed Jeff.
"What the hell, Kim?" He muttered and after glaring at him he talked to the officer. "I'm sorry for causing so much trouble." And with that we left.
We got to the elevator. Neither I nor he had said a word. When we got in no one was there, so I decided to burst. "Have you lost your mind?"
He looks at me. "What?"
"I left you alone while I went to eat breakfast and you were already being expelled from the hospital! For God's sake! You only woke up this morning and it's only 1:30 p.m.!" I was screaming really loud by the time we got to his bedroom. "Can't you live without me to cover for you?"
He was staring at me like I had asked the most stupid question in the whole world.
"No." He simply stated.
...
Was he testing my patience?
He continued, smirking. "After all, it's your part of the deal."
"But I won't be always around..." I explained. "There will come the time when we'll break apart."
"I don't want to." He said, looking serious.
When I was about to reply he came forward and kissed me. At first, I didn't know what was happening (I mean, this couldn't be truth... It was too good) but after a while I gave in.
When we broke for air, I woke up from this mindfuck and did the only logical thing to do in this situation...
I picked up my phone and wondered whether to call my father or not. As if it was magic it rang.
"Hi, dad!"
"Hi. Where are you?" My father retorted.
"I'm still in the hospital. Somewhere in the 4th floor."
"Oh. All right. Do you plan on going home or will you stick around with Jeff?"
Well, not exactly with Jeff. "Err... I'll be around here and then go home with you." Good, this way I won't be lying.
My father said «goodbye» and hung up... Now the only question left: what will I do?
Going back to Jeff's room doesn't sound like a good idea. Even though I know that he probably doesn't want me around, I guess I wouldn't bear to hear that from his mouth.
I could always go and take a walk in the garden... Yeah, that's a good idea!
"Aaarrghh!! Leave me alone!" Someone was shouting in the lobby. I rushed there to see what was happening.
"I'm sorry, but you have to come with me." It was another person. His voice didn't seem very happy.
"But I didn't do anything wrong!!" A boy said in his defence. "And I'm telling the truth! My arm IS broken!"
"I don't care! Who the hell said that you could enter the supplies room?" So the other man should be a policeman or something like that...
"I already apologized... I was only looking for someone and... Ooouch!!!" That sounds painful. "Excuse me! Could you at least hold me by the other arm?!"
When I got there, well, you can picture the scene: the policeman dragging the boy outside the hospital. And now... Surprise, surprise: the boy is Jeff. I should have guessed... I leave him alone and he screws everything up. Maybe I should just let the man take him... And again, if I did that there was the possibility that my father would be accused of negligence or so for letting a stupid patient, also known as Jeff, alone.
I was going to rescue him. "Excuse me, officer."
Two (very surprised) heads turn to face me. Jeff was the first one to talk. "Kim! Thank god you're here. I wa-"
"Quiet!" The man ordered Jeff and then talked to me. "Yes?"
"I'm very sorry for Jeff... My name is Kim and I know him: he's my father's patient. He suffered a car accident and hit his head, so he must be a bit confused and left the room, probably looking for me." I explained to the very angry man in front of me. After staring at me for a while his face softened... My apologetic and innocent look is amazing.
"Very well. Please make sure you don't leave him alone this time." The policeman let Jeff go, who immediately run to my side. "I don't want to be disturbed again because of him."
"I'm sorry." I apologized again and elbowed Jeff.
"What the hell, Kim?" He muttered and after glaring at him he talked to the officer. "I'm sorry for causing so much trouble." And with that we left.
We got to the elevator. Neither I nor he had said a word. When we got in no one was there, so I decided to burst. "Have you lost your mind?"
He looks at me. "What?"
"I left you alone while I went to eat breakfast and you were already being expelled from the hospital! For God's sake! You only woke up this morning and it's only 1:30 p.m.!" I was screaming really loud by the time we got to his bedroom. "Can't you live without me to cover for you?"
He was staring at me like I had asked the most stupid question in the whole world.
"No." He simply stated.
...
Was he testing my patience?
He continued, smirking. "After all, it's your part of the deal."
"But I won't be always around..." I explained. "There will come the time when we'll break apart."
"I don't want to." He said, looking serious.
When I was about to reply he came forward and kissed me. At first, I didn't know what was happening (I mean, this couldn't be truth... It was too good) but after a while I gave in.
When we broke for air, I woke up from this mindfuck and did the only logical thing to do in this situation...
quinta-feira, 3 de junho de 2010
REMINISCENCE - chapter 7
"But, as you're okay, maybe I should get going."
Where did you go, Kim?
"I don't want to force you to speak to me."
I don't understand you. What did you mean by that?
"-, Jeff." Someone called me.
"Errr... Come again?"
"We're so glad that you're awake but we have to go home and warn your sister." My mother said.
"You have your clothes here." My father started. "If you need anything else call us. Bye."
"OK, no problem. See ya!"
I'm alone again... I'd like to be here with Kim.
Well, she was really angry at me (for no apparent reason) so I shouldn't count on seeing her anytime soon.
However, there was something else in her eyes when she stormed out... She was hurt. I've already seen her like that.
Thank goodness I stole the janitor's keys.
Wait. That's not good! I got myself in more trouble... Well, I could always hide in this music room for eternity. At least until lunch break...
Oh crap! Someone's coming in! That awful man found me! Maybe he doesn't see me in the darkness.
Err... That's not the ape-face-janitor. It's a girl... If I keep this up I'm gonna have a heart attack. Fortunately she'll turn away and leave.
I still have to be born 1000 times until luck is on my side... Now she's hiding next to the drums... And sobbing.
"Buahhhh!"
And crying. Awww, man.
As it seems we're both hiding, we could talk. "Are you okay?" Ok, I know this is stupid... If she's crying she's not fine. "Errr... I mean... Hi! Who are you? I've never seen you around."
She's shocked to say the least. On the other hand she stopped crying.
"Hello." This was her answer. "My name's Kim. I've just moved here, today is my first day at this school."
"I see. Why were you crying?" I asked. "I mean, school isn't that bad."
She kept silent. I decided to shut up.
The bell rang warning it was lunch time. We didn't move an inch. There was a lot of noise, mainly students running. I took advantage of the loud sound to move around and sit next to her. Next ot her I could admire her features. "Wow, you've got red hair!"
She shifted uncomfortably and seemed even more hurt. Damn.
"It's because of that." She said bluntly.
"What?"
"Because of my hair." She answered. "In my class they started to mock me because of its colour."
I stared at her. "Why?"
"They're always comparing it with blood. The girls are always saying that I probably got a shower of pig's blood just like Carrie and then it dried on my head..." She was crying again. "I never wanted to come here in first place." She started raising her voice. "It's all because of my father! He insisted that we had to move or else we wouldn't be able keep living."
"Why?"
"Because of my mom's death."
I couldn't believe. She's lost her mother and her classmates made her suffer even more. It was so cruel.
"I'm sorry." I said while I hugged her in a attempt to stop her tears. "I didn't want you to recall more pain."
Her sobbing subsided. So I continued. "However, I'm sure that the girls in your class are just envious of you."
She chuckled. "Yeah sure." Sarcasm in her voice. "I can see why..."
"For real! I really like the colour of your hair... It looks like fire. It's such an unusual colour that no one can stop and not look at it. Besides it contrasts with the green of your eyes." This sounded really cheesy and corny but she was getting better. And it was true.
"Well, that still doesn't solve my initial problem."
"Hum... I think I can do something about that!" I said with a smirk.
She stared at me in disbelief.
"You just have to change class... If you want I can go with you in the afternoon and get the papers." I explained. "You can change into my class. We're all nice people to hang out. And I promise that if anyone picks on you, I'll stand up and protect you!" Oh yeah! This sure was a cool way to end it."You never have to be alone."
"Really?" She was smiling now. "Thanks!" I saw her eyes bright with happiness and that was... Woah! I don't know... Amazing? Kind of.
"In return..." I added. "Please, make up a good excuse that I can use for breaking the classroom's window and stealing the janitor's keys..."
She smiled. I knew that she was already thinking in one on her mind. "Don't worry. But first... Can we have something to eat, ..."
"Jeff." I forgot to present myself.
"- Jeff?" She finished her sentence.
"Of course! Let's get going." And we both took of.
"How am I supposed to fulfil my promise if you run away?" I wondered out loud.
I made up my mind. I'm going to sneak out of this bedroom. I only have a broken arm, I can go look for her. She should wait until her father finishes his shift.
After all, how hard can it be?
Where did you go, Kim?
"I don't want to force you to speak to me."
I don't understand you. What did you mean by that?
"-, Jeff." Someone called me.
"Errr... Come again?"
"We're so glad that you're awake but we have to go home and warn your sister." My mother said.
"You have your clothes here." My father started. "If you need anything else call us. Bye."
"OK, no problem. See ya!"
I'm alone again... I'd like to be here with Kim.
Well, she was really angry at me (for no apparent reason) so I shouldn't count on seeing her anytime soon.
However, there was something else in her eyes when she stormed out... She was hurt. I've already seen her like that.
Thank goodness I stole the janitor's keys.
Wait. That's not good! I got myself in more trouble... Well, I could always hide in this music room for eternity. At least until lunch break...
Oh crap! Someone's coming in! That awful man found me! Maybe he doesn't see me in the darkness.
Err... That's not the ape-face-janitor. It's a girl... If I keep this up I'm gonna have a heart attack. Fortunately she'll turn away and leave.
I still have to be born 1000 times until luck is on my side... Now she's hiding next to the drums... And sobbing.
"Buahhhh!"
And crying. Awww, man.
As it seems we're both hiding, we could talk. "Are you okay?" Ok, I know this is stupid... If she's crying she's not fine. "Errr... I mean... Hi! Who are you? I've never seen you around."
She's shocked to say the least. On the other hand she stopped crying.
"Hello." This was her answer. "My name's Kim. I've just moved here, today is my first day at this school."
"I see. Why were you crying?" I asked. "I mean, school isn't that bad."
She kept silent. I decided to shut up.
The bell rang warning it was lunch time. We didn't move an inch. There was a lot of noise, mainly students running. I took advantage of the loud sound to move around and sit next to her. Next ot her I could admire her features. "Wow, you've got red hair!"
She shifted uncomfortably and seemed even more hurt. Damn.
"It's because of that." She said bluntly.
"What?"
"Because of my hair." She answered. "In my class they started to mock me because of its colour."
I stared at her. "Why?"
"They're always comparing it with blood. The girls are always saying that I probably got a shower of pig's blood just like Carrie and then it dried on my head..." She was crying again. "I never wanted to come here in first place." She started raising her voice. "It's all because of my father! He insisted that we had to move or else we wouldn't be able keep living."
"Why?"
"Because of my mom's death."
I couldn't believe. She's lost her mother and her classmates made her suffer even more. It was so cruel.
"I'm sorry." I said while I hugged her in a attempt to stop her tears. "I didn't want you to recall more pain."
Her sobbing subsided. So I continued. "However, I'm sure that the girls in your class are just envious of you."
She chuckled. "Yeah sure." Sarcasm in her voice. "I can see why..."
"For real! I really like the colour of your hair... It looks like fire. It's such an unusual colour that no one can stop and not look at it. Besides it contrasts with the green of your eyes." This sounded really cheesy and corny but she was getting better. And it was true.
"Well, that still doesn't solve my initial problem."
"Hum... I think I can do something about that!" I said with a smirk.
She stared at me in disbelief.
"You just have to change class... If you want I can go with you in the afternoon and get the papers." I explained. "You can change into my class. We're all nice people to hang out. And I promise that if anyone picks on you, I'll stand up and protect you!" Oh yeah! This sure was a cool way to end it."You never have to be alone."
"Really?" She was smiling now. "Thanks!" I saw her eyes bright with happiness and that was... Woah! I don't know... Amazing? Kind of.
"In return..." I added. "Please, make up a good excuse that I can use for breaking the classroom's window and stealing the janitor's keys..."
She smiled. I knew that she was already thinking in one on her mind. "Don't worry. But first... Can we have something to eat, ..."
"Jeff." I forgot to present myself.
"- Jeff?" She finished her sentence.
"Of course! Let's get going." And we both took of.
"How am I supposed to fulfil my promise if you run away?" I wondered out loud.
I made up my mind. I'm going to sneak out of this bedroom. I only have a broken arm, I can go look for her. She should wait until her father finishes his shift.
After all, how hard can it be?
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